I Remorse My Children’ Non secular Names, And I Would Like To Change Them

My youngsters have been born throughout a time in my life when my husband and I have been very non secular: that large faith ( the one) that calls for your youngsters have a saint’s title caught in there. Actual devotees don’t stick it within the center and title their child Schuyler, both. When you’re the true factor, you stick that saint entrance and middle, and also you stack them. (That is how individuals find yourself with daughters named Mary Elizabeth Catherine, or Catherine Elizabeth Mary, or Elizabeth Catherine Mary). We went the straightforward approach: triple names, however two household names on the finish. We solely needed to provide you with the primary title. All my three of my sons’ names are non secular names.

I’d take again two of them.

I Love the First Title We Selected, Even If It’s A Non secular Title

My oldest’s title is completely distinctive: St. Blaise may be very obscure; it was #977 the 12 months he was born. We’ve got but to satisfy one other one. Nobody ever mispronounces it. We’ve got to spell it, however the title’s one-syllable, and it’s not one thing the overall populace would hear and say, “huh, that’s a kind of tremendous non secular names.”

If I may rename him something, I might nonetheless decide it. I find it irresistible that a lot. Although it truly is a non secular title, it’s stealth, and it doesn’t scream, “MAMA PRAYS FOR ME TO BE A PRIEST.” Most of all, the title matches him. It makes individuals smile after they hear and say yeah, that’s him, all proper.

So I’m Not Condemning Non secular Names, Interval

So I’m not blanket-condemning non secular names. It’s about an issue we have now with the faith: we left it. On the time we named our sons, we believed they wanted to have non secular names, and we named them accordingly. Now I don’t imagine it, and I want I had takebacks. You’ll be able to’t say “properly, you need to have considered that earlier than,” as a result of nobody thinks they’re going to depart their faith, particularly that one. It’s not a contingency you intend for. In truth, after we did depart it, we have been surprised and misplaced for a really very long time.

It’s doesn’t matter what we imagine now, and nor does our angle in direction of that individual faith (although it’s not very cordial). This isn’t concerning the faith. Loads of my pals nonetheless belong to it. Proper now, I’m regretting the maintain this faith exercised on my kids’s names. No extra and no much less. It advised me to offer my youngsters non secular names. So I gave all of them very, very non secular names.

And I remorse it.

Quantity 2 is Named After A Complete Misogynist

Volanthevist/Getty

If you delve into the profession of St. Augustine, the title we selected for child #2, you discover some fairly appalling rhetoric about girls, amongst different issues. However we weren’t that sort of non secular individuals who believed in these sorts of issues, so we ignored them. Augustine is consistently mispronounced and sometimes mistaken for a lady’s.

We’ve at all times shortened it August, which I really like. However his overly non secular title drags round behind him, persisting by kinds and formalities of his life. And whereas I really like his super-hippie nickname, I might select a super-hippie full title for him at present.

In truth, each of my youthful kids, reasonably than having overly non secular names, would most likely have super-hippie names: one in all my pals named her child Bowie and I form of hate her for the chance. Goddammit, I bear in mind pondering on the time. I want I may have finished that. I may have a child named Moon, just like the celestial physique and/or drummer from The Who. I may sit and record different selections all day. Ultimately, I’ll have simply named him for his delivery month, November, and referred to as him Ember.

And earlier than you say, “However your husband…” I carried them, barfed for them, jabbed my thighs with insulin needles for them, after which birthed them in all their bloody glory. I declare naming rights. He may have vetoed any of the above, and I’d have taken him to the mat on it.

However that faith additionally inspired submission to at least one’s husband. So did St. Augustine.

However Our Final Son Has The Most Non secular Title of All

If I may take again one title, only one, I might take again my youngest’s. He has essentially the most non secular title of all. You bear in mind these apostles from approach again in Bible instances? Suppose not simply of these dudes, however of essentially the most apostle-ly of all of them: not simply Simon. Not simply Peter. Simon Peter. Everybody was very happy with us.

I might title him nearly anything now. I hardly use his title, and once I consider it, I at all times have a twinge of remorse. I can dwell with my second son’s candy hippie-ish nickname. However this has no nickname. I remind myself that no, I at all times favored the title; it used to remind me of a personality in Lord of the Flies, a personality who’s imagined to symbolize all the nice qualities in human society (then will get murdered for it, however anyway).

However if you tag Simon to his center title, the household title Peter, it turns into an extremely non secular title. It screams, “WE LOVE THE LORD.” And since I’m form of agnostic at this level, amongst different issues, I cringe. If I had free selection on the time, I’d have picked any variety of names like those I discussed. However nope. It was their approach or the freeway, and we nonetheless had just a few years earlier than we’d decide the freeway.

We could not belong to that faith anymore. However our sons’ names do, and so they at all times will, a legacy they’ll drag with them by the remainder of their lives. I’d reasonably them drag Moon or West or Sky or River. Possibly the title of a mountain vary, like Panamint. I’ve acquired a foul case of title remorse to dwell with. And each time I hear a cool child title, it will get slightly worse.

The submit I Remorse My Children’ Non secular Names, And I Would Like To Change Them appeared first on Scary Mommy.