Ask Scary Mommy: Our Household Buys So Many Toys For Our Children It Ruins ‘Santa’ For Us

Ask Scary Mommy is Scary Mommy’s recommendation column, the place our workforce of “specialists” solutions all of the questions you could have about life, love, physique picture, associates, parenting, and anything that’s complicated you.

This week … what do you do when your prolonged household showers your kids with so many toys and presents that it leaves you, as “Santa,” scratching your head on what to get them?

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Expensive Scary Mommy,

My companion and I’ve three younger children below the age of 10. Our prolonged household — on each side — can’t cease, received’t cease shopping for All The Issues for our youngsters. Issues we don’t ask for, issues that go above and past any of our youngsters’ “want lists,” and issues that mainly depart us questioning what the hell we’re purported to get them. Some years they get our youngsters stuff we’ve already purchased for them, and the youngsters have even requested us why “Santa” would get them issues Aunt Cindy or Grandma and Pop-Pop have already purchased them. HOW DO WE GET OUR FAMILIES TO STOP BUYING ALL THE THINGS? With out hurting their emotions or seeming ungrateful, after all. Is that this an actual downside? HELP.

This will sound like a non-problem sort of downside, but it surely’s nonetheless a problem for positive. In the event that they’re asking you for a present listing for the youngsters forward of time, attempt to be trustworthy and set onerous limits. “Just one reward for every, Granny, as a result of after they get so many presents from you guys yearly, it makes it onerous on us as mother and father to offer them the massive Christmas morning we need to.”

Do you could have financial savings accounts arrange on your kiddos? In that case, inform them to deposit no matter they might usually spend on materials issues into their accounts. Certain, it’s much less thrilling and so they’ll undoubtedly complain. However that cash could be spent on extra precious issues down the road — new computer systems, back-to-school garments, post-high faculty schooling, faculty journeys, and many others.

You may additionally attempt asking for extra significant items, like hand-written letters to every youngster from their grandparents and the individuals who love them a lot. It might sound boring to your children now, however they’ll be so grateful for these in a while. Do-it-yourself items are nice, too. So are reward playing cards your children can use for a shared expertise — memberships to the zoo, museums, and different locations which can be secure (or shall be, post-pandemic).

I don’t suppose you’re ungrateful for feeling burdened by all of the generosity, as a result of as mother and father, we need to be those getting the “huge stuff” and the good reactions from them as a result of we love them a lot and it makes us comfortable to have the ability to do these issues for them. In fact, it makes your kinfolk comfortable to do it too. However you’re the mother and father, and they need to respect your needs. So long as you strategy the matter tactfully and from a spot of appreciation, really feel zero guilt about being trustworthy with your loved ones.

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